The god of women and the god of men.

Hmmm, I obviously need to think of something less boring than my flirtation with materialism that PC hunting induces in me.

Surprise surprise, I didn’t come out of the closet at Church today. I’ll be typing that for a fair few weeks I expect. But Mass today was wonderful, I love my parish so much. How many Catholics can say that? I only know a few parishioners because being an evening altar server means basically you never get to talk to anyone. You are busy clearing up and setting up for tomorrow while everyone else is busy rushing out the door to go home.

Talking of which when am I going to get the chance to ask that nice Catholic girl out? My priest thinks I’m bound for the monastery, he couldn’t be more wrong. I’ve spent time in monasteries, its ok for a few days but for the rest of my life, no thanks. Besides there is a certain machismo to monastic life, and probably rightly so. The last thing they need is me flirting with the novices for forty years.

Anyway, after clearing up the altar servers go down the pub and usually have a good bit of fun which makes up for it. If you become a Catholic it should be mandatory that you go down the pub with other Catholics every Sunday because I’m sure you learn more about the faith that way than you ever will in the RCIA.

Maybe one of the reasons why Catholicism is dying in the west is that the social aspect of it has gone. There are no longer Catholic clubs for people to bend their elbows at mainly because our pews are devoid of men after the liturgical emasculation of the Mass.

Talking of which, that is the biggest reason why I like my priest, he is no nonsense, he gets on with it, he’s not the best liturgist in the world but he avoids descending into camp, a problem which is rife in both high and low expressions of the faith. I apologize for being graphic but I’ve been at several Masses where the officiant is so camp its made my balls shrink. Does anyone think that Christianity would have converted the pagans of Europe if it had been as thoroughly wet as it is now? Do women really like it? do they realise this is scaring away all the men? This syrupy faith doled out by nuns in RCIA might make people feel warm and fuzzy for a while, but what happens when the rain comes and the going gets tough?

(I acknowledge the potential irony of a transsexual saying this, but I am not camp,”what never?” “well hardly ever” to quote the captain of the Pinafore…) 

My sister did a study of her evangelical Church when she was at theological college and discovered that all the leaders had the same personality type. That’s fine for protestants who think there should be a denomination for everyone, but is that what we are doing to Catholicism? Creating a Church for middle aged women? Hopefully not even middle aged women would want that. I wonder what the world would be like if the men believed in one religion and the women in another? the pagans did it so maybe Christians could slip into it too, in fact I’m beginning to wonder if it hasn’t already happened…

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