So then, a week has passed, not much has happened. My boiler broke so I couldn’t go out for a couple of days because if I don’t have a bath I can’t go out. (Washing in a sink is just rubbish)
So since I couldn’t go out I decided to do my shopping at ASDA online. Which was very impressive. Hassle free. £1 next day delivery. Only problem being I bought quite a lot of beer which usually I wouldn’t be able to carry back to my flat. So a couple of very cheap crates… then because I’d had a rough few weeks I drank said beer rather rapidly… so I’ve been hangover central the last couple of days and my sleeping pattern is totally shot.
So yes, as a result I’ve missed Mass, which is never a good idea because I’ll feel down for a week. On the plus side I spent £2 on some new tights… there is something wonderful about new tights and being housebound I’ve cross dressed a lot this week. Which has been great.
But its also led me to realise that its getting to the stage where it is very frustrating that I can’t be who I really am at Church. That maybe its time to admit to myself that this transsexual thing isn’t going away and that I have to do something about it before I go insane. I’ve dropped several hints to the guys I altar serve with, and they are bright guys, but confirmation is different.
This week I also saw a Facebook message with an old friend who is a side B gay Catholic who had ‘liked’ something, and basically it was the whole denial side of the Catholic response to homosexuality… and I couldn’t keep myself from commenting that I thought the article deeply tragic.
I find the use of the term “same sex attraction” extremely frustrating, it is a concession that you are not normal, and that there is nothing intrinsic about your sexual orientation. Which then is used to abrogate that part of the identity. It is a form of erasure. I guess as I identify ever more with being queer I’m beginning to get a homophobia meter that’s rather sensitive.
It seems weird to have to say but being gay is perfectly normal, it is a not uncommon state of being. If gay people surrender to the idea that they are freaks then the battle is over and we have lost. Homosexuality will only be accepted when it has become utterly boring, not even worth remarking on, a bit like saying someone is five foot four inches tall.
In more exciting news I have a new favourite website on the net, called http://www.shutupandsitdown.com/ its a website about board games, its really well designed, the videos and podcasts are funny, they are very discerning about good games. Check it out.
Their website design is simple but very elegant, it doesn’t remotely look like a kickstarter start up, big businesses should take note, it is so pretty and fast I just want to stay there all day. (Talking of which the Escapist magazine’s website has just gotten more cluttered and slower… )
The only unfortunate thing about the shutupandsitdown website is that I’ve now listened to ALL the podcasts and watched ALL the videos. So yes, I guess I need to find a board gamer group!